Note: This is fiction, for April Fool’s Day. The events depicted are not real. The names of individuals have not been changed. What is written here is not what anyone actually said or did. Tap/Click for more April Fool’s Day humor.
With an outpouring of jubilation and champagne, the City Council approved and adopted the Gateway Area Plan just prior to 10:00 p.m. on New Year’s Eve, December 31, 2024. In a never-before-seen scene set at City Hall, reminiscent of an Arcata version of the warm-hearted ending of the 1946 film “It’s a Wonderful Life,” the entire town rallied behind the promise (or premise) of affordable housing for working people.
Yet for the longest time it looked like the Gateway Plan’s passage wasn’t going to happen, at least not in 2024.
At their November meeting, the California Coastal Commission announced Arcata’s Local Coastal Plan, a necessary part of the General Plan 2045, to be deficient. This prompted a flurry of changes and updates by Arcata’s Community Development Director, David Loya. “Let’s just say we changed what we had to change and we did what we had to do,” Mr. Loya announced privately. “We can work on factual accuracy at another time.”
When asked by Planning Commissioners if these changes would need their approval, David Loya told them “We’ve inserted what we expect you’re going to say, as a Commission — that you concur with staff on this issue, for example.” [Editor’s note: This is an actual quote from David Loya, from the June 27, 2023, Planning Commission meeting.]
Notice of the Coastal Commission’s approval of the newly-revised Local Coastal Plan arrived in the late afternoon on Monday, December 30th. City staff immediately sprung into action. California’s Brown Act requires a “Special Meeting” be given at least 24 hours notice, and there was not a minute to spare. With the cooperation of the Mayor, a “Special Meeting” was scheduled for New Year’s Eve.
“We’ll make a party out it!” announced Mayor Meredith Matthews. “Where else would I rather be than with my friends, in my home-away-from-home, the Council Chambers?”
At the Mayor’s insistence, the evening’s Special Meeting was lavishly catered, and extensive arrays of libations were brought in by Septentrio Winery and Alchemy Distillery.
“With enough champagne, we can get anything done,” an asked-to-be-unnamed Councilmember remarked. “This could be the start of a trend.”
By California Fair Political Practices rulings, only three City Council members were permitted to discuss and vote on Gateway Area Plan matters, while the full five-person Council votes on other aspects of the General Plan. Because of the intermingling in the 1,990 page Environmental Impact Report of Gateway and General Plan issues — in many areas, Gateway and General Plan matters might be placed on alternate pages within the single document — this required lots of shuffling back and forth for Gateway-recused Councilmembers Stillman and Atkins-Salazar, as they walked or wobbled between the Council Chambers and the hidden “Insiders Only” room. Each time they returned to the Council dais, the two appeared happier than before, leading to speculation that “the special stuff” was being poured in the private party.
Due to technical difficulties, audio and video recordings of the Special Meeting were unavailable. “This was the party of the year, the best City Council meeting ever,” the Mayor told local news reporters a few days later. “If you weren’t there, you missed it.”
When the signatures were in place and the Gateway Area Plan and General Plan 2045 were officially adopted, balloons and confetti filled the room. Hugs and kisses abounded and cheers and shouts of joy prevailed. It was just as though it was the start of a New Year in Arcata.
Fifteen minutes later, when the hub-bub and merriment had subsided a bit, the Mayor restored order and returned to the meeting’s agenda. She asked if there were any communications from Staff. Community Development Director David Loya announced that, acting as Arcata’s Zoning Administrator during that 15-minute period, he had signed-off on 11 projects, all of them four stories tall but under 47 feet high, and all under 40,000 square feet in floor area. All the approved projects also avoided the Low Income and Moderate Income requirements of Inclusionary Zoning by having fewer than 15 apartment units.
Now, how it is possible that a 40,000 square foot building could only have 14 apartment units? The four-story Sorrel Place on 7th Street is about 56,000 sq.ft., and it has 44 apartments.
But that’s the topic for another tale.
As to the City Council Special Meeting on December 31st — Amazing fun. Arcata should pass projects like the Gateway Plan on New Year’s Eve every year. How about setting up Valley West for six-story buildings in 2025, and re-zoning the Bayview and Sunset neighborhoods for 4-story buildings and corner convenience stores the year after that?
It could all be standard operating procedure for a fun-oriented Council.
Stay tuned next year, for a New Year’s Eve Council Meeting of unlimited productivity.
